Him.

He was tall, at least a whole head taller than I stood, towering over most of everyone he met. His hair was the darkest of brown, so much so that it could have been mistaken for black if there weren’t pieces of it that revealed a bronze hue when directly hit by sunlight. His eyes had the same effect, looking as if they were vast and endless pools of black that could suck you in when their true honey-like pigment could be seen best in the sunlight. His build was what one could call average, I suppose, as he wasn’t very skinny but it was obvious that he was in shape or at least somewhat healthy due to the few defined muscles he had. His dark blue jeans fit rather tight in contrast to the looseness of his black t-shirt which was mostly covered by the worn leather jacket that hung on his shoulders. The faux leather was losing its stiffness, creasing in areas of his upper body that moved regularly while simultaneously fading in color in the same spots. His tennis shoes had held on through as many years as the jacket, it seemed, as they were dirty and also losing their original color. However, the most important physical feature of his I could recount was his smile, his teeth had clearly been cared for greatly as they were white despite the amount of coffee I know he drank daily; they were straight as could be, as well. The outermost parts of his eyes formed wrinkles and the pools of darkness were barely visible when they squinted during one of his smiles.

His voice, although husky at times, never wavered; he was always confident in what he was saying and would never regret or take any of it back. His laugh was my favorite, as it was the most light-hearted thing about him as if he were truly letting his guard down when doing so. He would hug me and I felt as if nothing could touch me other than the substantial warmth I got from only him. His smell was manly if that could account for anything, but also clean. It was an intoxicating mixture of wood and pine as well as a hint of mint.

All of this, however, could never compare to his personality. He was closed off to so many, yet he opened up rather easily to others, depending on how he felt about them immediately after meeting them. He made rational decisions, but only after thoroughly looking into the pros and cons alongside the consequences of each. He was smart, creative, funny, and, most importantly, full of love. He didn’t love often, but he loved so deeply that it trumped all other feelings when he did.

And yet, he never loved me.